黑料社

MANILA, Philippines鈥擬ost people would think that life inside the cloister is tough, especially since contemplatives, who committed themselves to a life of prayer, are required to observe strict seclusion with limited contact from the outside.

But for a nun at the Carmel Monastery of St. Therese of the Child Jesus in Quezon City, life inside the convent is a 鈥減aradise,鈥� pointing out that she would always describe contemplative life as 鈥渟piritual finesse.鈥�

鈥淲hen you are dealing with cloistered life, always remember that it is a call and that not all are called. So when it is a call for you, it is paradise for you,鈥� she told 黑料社.

This, as she explained that inside the monastery, a religious only wants to be with God: 鈥淭his is what you are asking for everyday. This is what you are longing for [and] it is given to you.鈥�

A contemplative for 50 years already, the nun was one of the over 10,000 individuals in the Philippines who celebrated the World Day for Consecrated and Religious Life on Sunday, Feb. 2.

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Instituted by John Paul II, now a saint, in 1997, the day is 鈥渋ntended for consecrated persons to renew their commitment and rekindle the fervor which should inspire their offering of themselves to the Lord.鈥�

The late pope said they should 鈥渃elebrate together solemnly the marvels which the Lord has accomplished in them [and] to discover by a more illumined faith the rays of divine beauty spread by the Spirit in their way of life.鈥�

鈥淸They have an] irreplaceable mission in the Church and in the world,鈥� he said.

Irresistible call

As a Carmelite, the nun, who spoke on the condition that she will not be directly identified so as to respect the cloister, stressed that 鈥渨e come in here to serve鈥攖o be with God and to serve the Church.鈥�

She said, however, that while she entered religious life at 22 years old, it was only in college when she heard God鈥檚 call: 鈥淚 was very attracted to the crucifix inside our classroom.鈥�

鈥淪o I was in college when the desire to enter cloistered life developed,鈥� the nun said, explaining that when she was still a child, she actually did not have the intention to become a religious.

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But since her mother had aspired to become a Carmelite but was prevented because she had to take care of her mother, the nun said it was from her that she realized her first inclinations on contemplative life.

It was in 1974 when she entered the monastery immediately after her college graduation. 鈥淪o from that time on, the call was consistent and I persevered,鈥� she said.

This, even when her father initially opposed the idea of her being a religious. However, when they got attacked inside their house, her father鈥檚 perspective changed and told her that 鈥渆ven now, you can go to Carmel.鈥�

鈥淪o for me, things like that happen. While we cannot understand, maybe it was the Lord鈥檚 way of talking to him,鈥� she said as she shared that her father realized that he can no longer protect her even inside their house.

Not easy

The nun had her solemn profession in 1980, making the vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience, but like when she was still an aspirant, then postulant and novice, there have always been struggles, both from the outside and inside.

Based on the website of the Carmel Monastery of St. Joseph in Canada, becoming a perpetually professed nun requires years of formation鈥攆rom the period of aspirancy to when the candidate makes her first profession.

What has been challenging, she said, was 鈥渉ow to be faithful when it comes to your deepest self so that you can give yourself completely鈥� as she explained that when you鈥檙e already inside, you thought you had already given all.鈥�

鈥淵ou still have your inclinations, you still have your desires, you still have your little quirks that you cannot give up. You deal with that [because] the subconscious hides many things,鈥� she said.

But God made her understand what is dryness in prayer life, saying that until now, the dryness has been sustained because 鈥淐armel is not all into consolation, so when you are still into consolation, you are still immature.鈥�

鈥淪o the dryness, when you 鈥榖efriend鈥� it, then you go to God, you relate with God in a more solid manner, no consolations. Remember what St. John of the Cross said: Do not pick flowers on the way,鈥� she said.

This, the nun explained, means that when you are going through the journey, one should not focus a lot on things that the world gives. 鈥淐learly, they can be burdens and they can distract you. [Focus on] the will of God.鈥�

Sense of liberty

鈥淭he challenge is really not so much the world because I鈥檝e already left it,鈥� she said while explaining the sense of freedom that one feels when she is already living inside the cloister.

She explained: 鈥淏ecause when you are outside, you are too engrossed in exterior things. What will you wear? What are your dreams? What are your goals? How do I become rich? How do I make money? What kind of family will I build?鈥�

鈥淭hose are the things that occupy your mind. Inside, you are freed from that,鈥� she said.

Inside the monastery, the nun and the rest of the community 鈥済ive not only their prayers, but our total life.鈥� 鈥淥ur whole self, even our desires, is offered for the salvation of souls, for the good of the Church, for the good of all.鈥�

Next year, their convent, located at Gilmore Avenue, will celebrate its 100th year, and if the nun would be asked what she will pray for, she said she would ask for more people to respond to God鈥檚 call.

Currently there are 14 nuns inside the monastery. The youngest is 38 years old, while the oldest is 90 years old. Last year, Sr. Teresa Joseph Patrick of Jesus and Mary, who was previously the oldest at 104, died.

鈥淚 hope young people will discover that our faith is so beautiful, our faith is so solid and that it is the true faith. I hope they will not give up and that they will not listen to the sirens of the world,鈥� she said.

But if they will listen to the sirens of the world, 鈥淚 would pray that they will find themselves later on, wanting silence and solitude.鈥� 鈥淪o I hope that they will discover what is the real thing in their lives. What is it that really draws them?鈥�

鈥淚 would pray that they will not be afraid鈥攖hat they will be brave enough to pursue what they want because it is their responsibility to find out what they really want and to pursue that,鈥� she said.

鈥淚f you have the vocation to a cloistered life, do not be afraid,鈥� she stressed.